I wonder why???!!!

I wonder why some people can be so downright evil?

I mean like, eeeeeeeeeevilllllllllll.........

Like, the-spawn-of-the-devil evil.

Like, a back-stabbing bitch and mother of all assholes!!!

Was talking to a friend yesterday, told her the last 2 years was the lowest point of my working life. Crushed self-esteem. Self-doubt.

I don't think I am that bad or am I?

Maybe she hates me cause I didn't "kipas" her. Sorry, I don't believe kipas-ing my way into somebody's good grace.

Maybe she hates me for having an opinion. Helloooo... I have a brain!!!

Oh god. My 2 years stint there was hell. She sucked the life out of you till you do not even have the will and motivation to live.

You think I over dramatise the situation?? Oh mannnn... If you can only see.

Lucky for me, I am finally away from the evil cluthes of the queen of the damned. I am happier where I am now. Although it's not all perfect but much, hell, A LOT better than before.

Last I heard that person now has acquired a minion that I think fits her criteria. A total suck up that puts a starfish to shame.

I pity my ex-colleagues who are still stuck there. Since I am no longer there I guess the devil's spawn have to find a new person to torture. Hang on my friends, I hope things will get better.

What's my name??

During the last 24 years of my life I've always been known by one name. I rarely used my given name instead I've always been called by the shorter version of that name. And sometimes by another shorter version of the shorter version of my given name. A single syllable and 2 letter word. Simple. Quite kampung like name.

4 years ago I moved here. Reported for duty and almost immediately given a new name and I didn't make an attempt to correct them. Before long, everybody called me by that name and it's too late to make any correction. Its like a glamourised version of my given name. 4 years down the road, people still called me by my new name. And I still responded to it.

Maybe I should start using my old nickname again. I miss people calling me Sinta.

This is a post drafted awhile back but didn't get a chance to post it up.

*************************************************

2 weeks ago a very close cousin of mine passed away due to injuries from an accident. The last time I saw him was during his sister's wedding in December 2008. His wife just delivered their 3rd child a few weeks earlier. He was young, he had 3 young children who adored him. I've never imagined he would leave us so soon.

I'm going to be honest, my family is not exactly a normal bunch of people. We have our problems. Oh man, you can't imagine the kind of problems we have to deal with on a daily basis. The one thing that I can't understand is, of all the person, why him? Why can't the problem maker(s) get chosen and save us all the trouble?

...

I'm still fighting the temptation.

I think it's getting worst.

I think I'm fighting a losing battle.

I think I might just give in.


Preparation?

In motion.


When?
Soon.


M.O.?
To be determine.

Another un-named post

Hi ya all.

I know it's been awhile. Partly cause I don't have internet access at home and they blocked blogger in the office (sucks!). Every time I'm at the Starbucks or any other place with free Wifi, I always forgot to update this blog. Not that there's been anything interesting happened in my life pun.

Life has been pretty stagnant.

I did threw a surprise party for a close friend recently. Been planning for it for about 3 weeks with a bunch of friends. For me it was a satisfying event. It pleases me that she really loves the surprise and more so that she loves the birthday present that we gave her.


At times it did crosses my mind that making my friends happy makes this life worth living. For me I think this is the sole reason why I chose to remain breathing.

But it did sadden me that one close friend of mine wasn't able to join us for the surprise. If she was alive, she would be super excited planning for the surprise together. But I know she was with us in spirit that night.

Today is the 4th month she left us. I still miss her. I still cry at night thinking about her.

I can't help thinking, it should've been me not her.