Updates! Updates!!!

Good news!!!

Chelo is BACK!!!!! Few weeks back, somebody from my neighbourhood called. They've been jaga-ing Chelo for 3 weeks. They found him wandering around and decided to care for him while looking for the owner. So one fine day they found my poster and they called and returned Chelo back to me!!! Yeay!!!

THANK YOU!!! THANK YOU!!! To Chelo's saviour!!!

Tapi Chelo still macam tu juga.. Still sombong!!! But I love him nevertheless hahahahaha...

I had BBQ Part II at my house. Good turn out. Good company. Good food. It was sooooo much fun than Part I. I think I should buat Part III soon... Hmmmm.. Maybe later lah :)

Morbid or Suicidal???

I took leave yesterday cause I have lots of things to do..
Meet agent for my car insurance renewal, send car for service.. Bla.. Bla.. Bla..

Once everything's over and done with I went home, tired and too lazy to do anything productive.
The thing I hate most about being alone at home with nothing to do (actually I have lots but as usual I procratinate) is I'll start thinking about all my problems/issues.

I know we should always look at the root cause of our problems and try to find ways to solve them. But in my case, I hate thinking about them and I'm hoping if I don't dwell on them it'll eventually go away. Yeah right!!!

Thinking about them always have a negative effect on my mood!! At times I think I can't handle them anymore. I've had it. I'm so tired with everything and I don't know how long I can keep on pretending that everything's OK.

I am soooo in need of a time away from everything. Temporarily or permanently??

I was dwelling on a question last night..

"If you've been thinking about death, does that makes you Morbid??

If you've been thinking about ceasing to live, does that makes you Suicidal??"

Then I found this in the net this morning. I think it's beautiful.

"I wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned, the hard way, that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, and end.

Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next. Delicious Ambiguity"

Anyways peeps, I think I want to activate my anti-socialiness at least for these next few days or maybe weeks.

Was thinking of spending a time alone away from KL this weekend but a group of my friends is going for white water rafting in Perak this Saturday. So I thought why not join them right?? No rafting for me though I just want to be away from KL. The fake KLites!!

So I guess my anti-social plan will have to wait.

MISSING!!

As of today its been a week and 2 days my darling cat, Chelo is missing. Sob.. Sob..

I've put up posters, distributed flyers around the neighborhoods but to no avail. He is still missing...

I miss him!!!

Last night was terrible!! I wanted to call somebody just to talk and I couldn't find anybody in my phonebook that I can talk to. Suddenly I feel so alone. I have lots of friends and yet I feel so alone.

Don't get me wrong. My friends are great, it just that I can't open up myself to any of them. I don't think I've ever talk about anything personal with any of my friends hmmm..

I guess that's just the way I am.

Oh I don't know...

All I can think about right now is I want my cat back, safe and sound.. huhuhu..

I MISS YOU CHELO!! PLEASE COME HOME!!!

Down memory lane...

Heya peeps...

I know it's been awhile. Things has been super crazy lately and my internet got suspended.. etc.. etc.. Sucks!!

Anyways, I finally got around to cleaning up my room. Oh god, you have NO idea what rubbish I've been accumulating these past months!!! I even took the before and after photos hahaha.. Just for the fun of it but of course I'm not gonna post them here.. Embarassing wei!!!

OK so, while I was cleaning up, I found a few stuff that I brought here from KK. Stuff from the good ol' days :D

I found a stack of letters my friends sent me while I was studying in Sarawak. It was fun reading them again. I am Loved!!! :)

Then I read this 1 particular letter from a person who used to be one of my closest friend then. We are no longer friends now... Sad!! Truth is, I can't even remember the exact reason why we were fighting and "unfriend" ourselves.

Suddenly I have this strong urge to give her a call and to start all over again on a clean slate but as usual my Super Big Ego prevented me from doing so and cos I don't know where she is now and how to get hold of her.

It got me thinking, I know for sure that we'll never be the friend we used to be but I think it'll be good to part in a good way. I mean, if I die tomorrow at least I know that though we're no longer buddies but there a no more bad feelings between us.

Hhhmmmm...

"What is our deepest fear?"

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.

Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.

It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us.
Your playing small does not serve the world.
There is nothing enlightened about shrinking
so that other people won't feel insecure around you.

We are all meant to shine as children do.
It's not just in some of us; it is in everyone.

And as we let our own lights shine,
we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.

As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.